Category Archives: counseling

Help for the helpers

therapists need therapy

On occasion I will share personal experiences in an effort to make of myself a mirror. To reflect back my struggles and my growth so that others don’t feel alone.
I help because I understand
I understand because I’ve been there
and I return there with the hopes of bringing someone else out with me…

It’s difficult being in the helping profession when you yourself are not on solid ground. I have experienced some trials and tribulations and as much as part of me wants to hold on to anger and bitterness, as much as I feel I have a right to these emotions; that they are some how righteous, I also know that clinging to them is hindering me. It is negatively effecting everything I do, from my business to my children, and it is time to shift. Oh it won’t be easy, but it is necessary.

Choosing to be ok when things are falling apart takes way more courage than we ever give or get credit for.
Fighting to change your narrative, smiling through your tears, turning screams of frustration into declarations. Those are the acts of soldiers and I’m battling right along side you.

I can’t effectively be As Solid As A Rock for others when I am crumbling. So today I rebuild.
Because I too am worthy of being holistically well!

Yulinda Rock

When they tell you to just pray…

pray away

You can’t pray away depression, or any mental illness. Some might find that statement offensive. But the reality is that many people, especially minorities, view therapy as an affront to God.

“I don’t need therapy, I just need to pray harder.”

Or maybe you can pray to be guided to a professional that can help you. Therapy is a tool to help achieve mental wellness, and should be seen as such. In my opinion, not utilizing the tools which can help us become more fully what we were created to be is much more of an affront. Prayer WITH WORK works. Seeking and going to counseling is doing the work, and you are worthy of it.
You are meant to be holistically well.
Yulinda Rock

National Minority Mental Health Awareness Month

Minority mental health

July is National Minority Mental Health Awareness Month. What I find interesting and sad is that I bet almost no one knew. As a matter of fact I didn’t know until literally minutes ago. Minority mental health and mental health in general is often overlooked, undervalued, and overly minimized. With everything that’s going on in the US and the world in general, I can’t help but wonder how much of the Earth’s pain is due to under-recognized, undiagnosed, and untreated mental illness. The constant barrage of anger, sadness, fear, frustration, rage, confusion, and despair on my personal Facebook timeline leaves me seething with indignation that mental illness is always sacrificed on the altar of budgets, consequences be damned. I’ve been dealing with my own fear which has led me to be stagnant for some months now. However, I cannot in good conscience sit back and do nothing. For the voices that often go unheard, the very least I can do is listen.
We are all worthy of being holistically well. . .
Yulinda Rock

“later that night
i held an atlas in my lap
ran my fingers across the whole world
and whispered
where does it hurt?

it answered
everywhere
everywhere
everywhere.”
― Warsan Shire

Children Mental Health Awareness

childrens mental health!

Dancing through daffodils
Smiling at the frog as it leaps to freedom
Upturned face capturing the sweet breeze
Swing set waiting in anticipation for little legs to set it flying
Sprinklers chase them through the grass
As peals of laughter waft up to the listening ears of perched birds
Sun shining on closed lids
As they wake up from a dream full of peace
Only to open their eyes and realize it’s another day
Another day of being sad
And they wish they could go back to sleep again
The escape of a child…
~Yulinda Rock

Caring for children is one of the most important tasks we have as adults. All around us is evidence of what happens when we don’t: Chaos.

May 5th is children’s mental health awareness day. We must understand that as the stewards of young lives our job goes way beyond just feeding and clothing them. It means being responsible for both their physical and mental well-being. With over 18 years of experience working with the mental health of young people (from a mentor at age 18, to case manager, to school counselor) I have seen first hand the devastating effects of what happens when a child’s mental health is neglected.

I posted this two days early to give us a little time to reflect on how we can be a catalyst for positive change in a young persons life. So on Thursday May 5, and hopefully everyday, take time to speak life into the world of a child. Your words mean more than you may ever know, so make them encouraging.
You are worthy of being holistically well, and so are our children.
Yulinda Rock

Children feel sad. They feel frustrated. They feel angry. They feel happy. They are human so they feel.  But sometimes they do not know how to deal with those feelings, how to manage those emotions. They might not actually know that something is wrong; they just know that something isn’t right.

May 5, 2016 is National Children’s Mental Health Awareness Day. Children’s mental health problems are real, common and treatable. Unfortunately, although one in five children has a diagnosable mental health problem, very few receive the help they need.

Mental health is important to overall health. Mental health disorders are chronic health conditions (those that go on for a long time and often don’t go away completely) that can continue throughout the lifespan. Without early diagnosis and treatment, children with mental health disorders can have great difficulty. Untreated mental health problems can disrupt every facet of a child’s world, from home to school, from the playground to the larger outside community. They are at an increased risk of school failure, contact with the criminal justice system, and even suicide.

Mental health in childhood means learning healthy social skills and how to cope when there are problems. Mental health disorders among children are described as serious changes in the way children typically learn, behave, or handle their emotions, which cause distress and problems getting through the day.

Childhood mental health disorders do not discriminate. They affect every type of child and every type of family. Boys and girls of all ages, ethnic/racial backgrounds, socioeconomic status, and living all over the world, experience mental health disorders, no one is exempt. According to the World Health Organization, globally 50% of mental illness that occurs in a lifetime begins by age 14.

Children’s mental health is without a doubt the most important aspect of any child’s social and cognitive development. Parents and family members are usually the first to notice if a child has problems with emotions or behavior.

There are a variety of components that can impact a child’s mental health. When it comes to children’s mental health, as guardians the best thing to do is provide children with an environment full of love, understanding, healthy boundaries, compassion, and trust. However, even with the best of intentions, some things are out of one’s control. Some disorders are genetic and in those instances the best thing to do is to become educated in the disorder, utilize available resources, and access the necessary care. Then there are those special circumstances where a family adopts. The child may be a family member or they might not be, but whatever the child’s biological background, there may come a time when additional supports are needed in the home to help navigate the feelings and emotions that come up throughout the adoption journey.
Although it is a potentially difficult time, resources are available. With the help of a good practitioner, a willingness to work through the process and the knowledge that positive change is possible, your child or young adult can achieve mental wellness.

Balance…

balance

Balance
elusive yet desirable
attainable
but sacrifices must be made
to reach the Bliss point where all things sit on their perch just so
letting go of one to uplift the other
sister
mother
lover
friend
in the end there is a give and take
or in the wake of the tumultuous juggling will be broken things scattered at your feet
So I repeat
Balance
desirable but hard to maintain
one must refrain from doing too much or not Enough
rebuffed by the pressure to do all
to not let anything fall
by the wayside
Pride we must check
respect your limitations by celebrating all that you do in lieu of perfection
we honor intentions
make sure yours are pure
sacrifice all that you were
In order to become the person you must be
To achieve
Balance…

You are worthy of being holistically well
Yulinda Rock

Time Management…

leap

February 29.  The day that happens only once every 4 years and on this day I find myself reflecting on these first two months of 2016, what I have accomplished, and have yet to do.

So as you reflect on your entry into 2016 be gentle with yourself but be honest.  Take stock of these past months.  Did you do everything you set out to do?  If you did how did you mange to do so?  If not, why not?  What hindered you?  What can you do to combat those obstacles?  Two months down, ten more to go!  How do you plan to live them?

January and February have been whirlwinds of randomness for me.  I failed at intentionally going after my goals.  I didn’t work out like i planned to.  I didn’t track my calories.  I neglected to update my website.  My business social media platforms were woefully bare.  Networking??  Fahget about it!

However despite all I didn’t do, I managed to live.  I cried, I laughed, I screamed for both joy and because of pain, I watched TV, and just lazed around.  And although I didn’t do all that I sought to I did something that I have not been able to do in a long time, appreciate the moments.

With that being said, its time to get back to business.  I’m using this extra day to focus. To regroup.  To better manage my time.  Find BALANCE.

My pendulum tends to swing far right or far left, and I know I’m not the only one that operate in extremes.  Let’s make the leap together to better manage our time and find the balance that will be a step toward holistic wellness.

We are worthy…

Yulinda Rock

Anchor

anchor

It’s been a quiet month of January for me. It made me anxious that I had not posted. I felt compelled to force communication and every time I came here to post, it felt unauthentic, so I chose silence.
And in that silence I remained true to myself.

Often we do things not because we want to but because we feel we should. At times sacrificing to the point where we have nothing left, not even for ourselves.

Does this sound familiar? Giving from a place which others do not replenish, leaving it empty?

It is a wonderful thing to be caring. To want to help others, but not if it diminishes you.
That way lies bitterness.

Im not exempt from the lesson. It took me a while to get it. I have an innate need to help but in my quest for discernment I am learning the difference between helping and enabling.
I am now no longer willing to drown for others to float, and neither should you.

You are worthy of being holistically well.
Yulinda Rock